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sadness

me and mom




yesterday i spent at least an hour encamped in my doctor's bathroom, shitting, throwing up and crying out a panic attack, a few minutes in a cab ride to the emergency room where i was born, had heart surgery and gave birth, and several hours lying down in an emergency room staring close up at the wall and waiting for imaginary dangers and real ones to duke it out inside my body.  as usual, today i feel more embarrassed than anything else.

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